Monday, August 24, 2009

sometimes we just need to kick ourselves

i never thought i would say this but today apparently i will:

I CANT WAIT FOR MY MID TRIMESTER BREAK TO BE OVER

and it is all thanks to the teaching experience durjana that I have to go through this two week.
it is only the first day of my teaching experience and im feeling that my life has been drained out of me. im. totally. knackered. when i havent really started yet. all i did was observing how my associate teacher teach and manage the classroom and once in a while I try to appear intrested in what the kids are doing (while they must think that im such a bz body to keep peering over their homeworks)

now i totally understand how it feels to be in the working force. now i totally get it why people say studying is the best stage of life no matter how psycho it can make u feels at time.

it makes me afraid to be in the real world. huhu.

well, but this is the path i chose, although i complained a lot, im not going to back out.
because I know, Allah had destined me to take this profession for a reason. and one reason I can think of is because it is a very good channel for Da'wah. so persevere sarah!! whenever i feel that things are going tough, i always remember this ayat from Quran:

( فَإِنَّ مَعَ ٱلۡعُسۡرِ يُسۡرًا (٥) إِنَّ مَعَ ٱلۡعُسۡرِ يُسۡرً۬ا (٦

which means: "So, verily, with every difficulty, there's a relief (5) Verily, with every difficulty there's a relief (6) [Al-Insyirah]

beautiful2 verse, with a beautiful2 meaning, as if talking directly to me.

I should know better: Org Islam mesti berjiwa besar! we muslims must be strong!!


p/s- I really2 miss reciting to His love letter *cry*

6 comments:

hafiz CHouJi said...

Salam 'alayki.

I think you need to loosen up a bit. Thinking negative thoughts won't help you. Try to be more positive - kids love company but they are a bit slow to open up and trust strangers. Don't just look at them, they'll feel like you are bugging them. Try to start a small talk with them while helping out any task they are working on.

Knowing you (from FB photos etc.), I think you are good with kids. Just try to be yourself, don't worry too much about the hard stuffs (those lesson plans and the TE booklet thingy) and mingle around with those kids more. InsyaAllah you'll find yourself enjoying their company. :')

My two pence:
Responsibility is something not to be taken light, yes. But I think it is also not something to be frowning about. Reflect on your niat and make sure that you do it for Allah. InsyaAllah you'll find satisfaction in everything you do despite how tiring it can be. :')

~p/s: Even if you can't read Quran, you can still recite whatever verses you have memorised. And that is counted as ibadah, insyaAllah.

mizzshaina said...

btul ke boleh ek? ore kate ustaz die ckp tak bleh walaupun da hafal.

the girl with big dreams said...

seingat kite kalu dh hafal bole je recite. x pasti,tny yg lebih arif.

huuuuuu sarah!!!!!!!!!!!!!
kite pn takuuutttt
mcm2 cikgu ni expect kite buat kn..
huhu
nk observe,nk build rltship lg, nk lawan ngantuk n lapar lg
haha
ni x keje betul2 lg ni..

building rltship is not that easy,
especially for us wearing this hijab, i dont want to use it as an excuse, but it is really hard as they still perceived us as "aliens" no matter how many times they see ppl with hijab.

preparing to teach would also be hard as we are not native speakers if english.
rase sikit terancam di situ babe, walaupun i know all of them are really supportive.
nk paham how the school works pun takes time ok. ni tbe2 soh ajar trus without any background knowledge watsoever.

all the teachers said that our 2 weeks programme are ridiculous and MEAN.
kaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan?????

sigh.
hope you're doiing well over there.
hope we're all oing to immprove somewhat over the next 2 weeks.

penatla sarah.
semlm balik trus pengsannn
mlmni x bole nk pengsanawal2 sbb kne wat lesson plan.
sape ckp jd cikgu senang meh cni ak cungkil biji mata baru tauuuuu

mizzshaina said...

haha
tulaaa..kite rase cam phobia plak nak keje
ni pun kite da pnat gler. mate da tak larat aje
tapi tak tgk2 lagi lesson plan. nasib baik associate teacher kite sporting, die suh kite copy je lesson plan yang da ade dalam buku and type balik. tu pun kite tak larat nak buat. rase lemah2 je badan. rase2 nye cam ade potensi je utk kurus banyak pada ramadhan kali ini. haha. sbb tak puasa pun kite tak makan. ble makan pun x bleh nak mkn byk sbb pnat..huuuu.pnatnye weyhhh. educ lagi ntah ble nak cari resource. next week sure lagi pnat kott. okla, nak tdo dulu la, tak larat. (hari2 gi keje kul 7 balik kul 5 weyyyyyy) japgi baru nak bgn buat keje.

gudlak mengajar. kite kne ajar kames. arghh. kegigilannn

mizzshaina said...

oh, btw, tadi dlm meeting kite punye principle ckp "no one ever said teaching is easy"

now, why I never thought dat way before?? *padan muke*

hafiz CHouJi said...

Of course teaching is not easy. Responsibility pon besar. I have an ustaz told me this:

If a doctor made a mistake, it might cost a single life or two.
If an engineer made a mistake, it might cost a dozen or even a hundred lives.
But if a teacher made a mistake, it might cost the whole community.

. . . scary, isn't it?

So that's why kita kena senantiasa mintak Allah mudahkan urusan kita, bantu kita di waktu2 kita tertekan. Allah kan tempat meminta bantuan (al-Ikhlas: 2)? :')

Owh ye. Pasal recite Quran bila datang bulan, bole kalo da hafal. Sebab kalo ayat Quran yang da hafal da kire cam zikir. Jadi bole recite. Wallahua'lam.

~p/s: Nice new layout eh? :'D

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